A HERO'S JOURNEY

A HERO’S JOURNEY

            The part of the video that impressed me the most was the statement he made, “What matters most isn’t the prize at the end but how the hero is changed in the process.” When I heard this, I immediately thought about my marriage and my singleness. I converted to the Church when I was 30 and I was single at the time. I never felt more aware of my singleness until I became a member of the Church. It seemed like that was the “prize” that most, if not all, women and men were striving for. Here I was, 30 and single and faced with the fact that attending a family ward was my only choice living in Texas at the time. However, once I made the move to Utah a year later, I attended the Mid-singles ward. The best way I could explain this ward was that it was for those who never graduated from a YSA and had to go to “summer school” at the Mid-singles ward. Or those who DID graduate but had to repeat the grade due to divorce.

            As I attended this ward, I found that many members, men, and women were focused on the wrong thing, marriage. I was guilty of this, too! Walking into this ward for the first time was like a meat market. I was the “new meat” and acquired quite a few dates because of this! After many failed relationships with members and non-members, I realized I was the common denominator. After acknowledging this, I sought out counseling, put into practice healthier habits that focused on me rather than a potential mate. A few months later, I met my now-husband. Taking the focus away from the end goal, marriage, and redirecting it to me made all the difference.

            From this experience I learned that it wasn’t about the “prize” of being married, but instead the process that led to it. I learned how to be happy being single, to avoid “fixer-uppers”, and to enjoy the journey, no matter how long it may have taken. Now that I’m married, I know that it is still a journey but a journey that I’m not alone on.

I learned how going from being single to being married changed me. I learned how important self-care is, how serving someone else can bless you in the process, how focusing on not being married yet in my 30’s was wrong. This journey of marriage is allowing me to grow, serve, and love more than I had anticipated. I’m so grateful for this journey!